


Slow Dancing In a Burning Room

by emsuzz2012



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, I do what I want, John Mayer - Freeform, Sad, Songfic, kinda moody, rated for language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-31
Updated: 2014-07-31
Packaged: 2018-02-11 03:57:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2052687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emsuzz2012/pseuds/emsuzz2012
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They understood each other too late....their time's running out</p>
            </blockquote>





	Slow Dancing In a Burning Room

**Author's Note:**

> Alrighty then, got my homework out of the way finally and I’m out of my funk so now I can write…except…too bad this one doesn’t have a happy ending. This is AU because it starts after they leave Providence and they don’t even go to the café. There’s also a re-ordering of the scenes from the episode “Nothing Personal” because they fit the song better after I changed them…and because I can.
> 
> Slow Dancing in a Burning Room - John Mayer
> 
> I own nothing except the hope for Skyeward in season 2.

Skye had no intentions of cracking the encryption on the hard drive.  The only reason she had left was because she knew she had to play along in order to buy the team more time to come back and find her.  At least…that’s what she kept telling herself.  Those kisses back at Providence meant nothing.  She didn’t feel anything towards him.

She looked away from her laptop over to where the ex-specialist was standing, spray can in hand, and covering up the logo of the agency she had worked for all of a day.  Life was seriously a bitch right now.

It took a few seconds for her to realize the can had stilled and raised her head to meet his deep stare. For a moment, it felt as if he looked as sad as she felt, and her mind was instantly clouded by doubt.  What if he changed his mind?  What if he wasn’t Hydra?

Their eyes met once more and this time a wry smile stretched across his face, earning a sorrowful one from her in return. 

**_It’s not a silly little moment,_**

His feelings for her wouldn’t change his mind.  Why would it? He’s just playing her. 

A beep on her laptop brought her attention back down and she was thankful for the distraction.  This was getting harder and harder to do and she just hoped she could keep up the act until someone came for her.  Maybe if she gave herself these last moments with him, it would be enough to ease the pain after everything goes down. 

Footsteps echo in the hangar as he approaches her and she turns around to face him before he closes in on her.  Her back pressed into the counter and she was gripping the counter so tight that her knuckles were losing their color.  A shaky breath escaped her as she looked down at her shoes in an attempt to calm her nerves.

**_It’s not the storm before the calm._ **

“What’re you up to?”

Dark chocolate orbs met her hazel ones and she allowed herself to search them for any signs or emotions that resembled hope for the situation…for them. 

“Just getting everything ready for when we get to the diner.  That way we don’t have to be there very long.”

Was this what their relationship had come to? Seeing who could out-lie the other?

“Good thinking…that way we can slip in and slip out.”

The suggestiveness in his voice combined with his fingers reaching to wrap around her hips spread warmth through her body that had been numb up until now.  She’s not supposed to feel this way about a murderer right?

Grant pulls her towards him and her hands skim up his arms to grip his biceps, eyes meeting his once more.  A smile is her response, not trusting her voice to keep from saying things she shouldn’t.

**_This is the deep and dying breath of, this love that we’ve been working on._ **

 

* * *

 

No. Not good thinking. He wanted to take as much time as possible.  Delay the inevitable.

He wanted these last few moments where they could pretend they were happy. 

Skye’s suspicious behavior set off warning bells the minute he found her outside the closet at Providence.  Chalking it up to nerves and the stress they had endured he simply shrugged it off, but her short sentences had a bite to them now and her eyes told more than he wanted to know. 

She knew. 

He wasn’t sure how much she knew, and he didn’t want to know, but now his job was ten times harder. 

Garrett’s advice would be to kill her as soon as she was finished with the hard drive.  _No_ _loose_ _ends_. 

The tactical side of his brain wanted to find a place he knew better than some diner—where they could get lost in the crowd and whatever eyes he knew Garrett had watching him would be distracted long enough for him to get her out.  The spy side of his brain however, was trying to conceive a much more deceiving plan as to not attract a death warrant on both of them.  The only option he had come up with so far was to get her arrested and escape the police on his own, convincing Garrett they were compromised and there was nothing they could do.

Either way. He lost.

Comprehending how much his life sucked was unfathomable right now. First his family, then Buddy, and now Skye.  He thought being the good soldier—doing what they’re always told no questions asked—was supposed to get a reward for a job well done.  All he kept getting was the things he cared about taken away.

That’s why he cut feeling anything out of his regiment.  No feelings, meant no hurt.  Bullet proof plans that not even the Cavalry could crack into.  Hackers though…weren’t what he was used to.  Skye had been a wild card ever since she stepped foot onto the plane, and threw a wrench in his mission ever since he became her S.O.

Becoming her supervising officer was _intended_ to be a tactical move.  She was an unknown variable that he needed to learn the strengths and weaknesses of; putting himself in the position of teaching her certain strengths was supposed to make his job a hell of a lot easier. 

That idea sure went to hell in a hand basket.

 _Compromised_. That’s what his file should say instead of his name.

Then again…when he allowed himself the illusion of being the Grant Ward she knew…he wasn’t so mad about it.

The grip his fingers held on her waist tightened slightly before bringing her closer still, pressing them flush against one another.

**_Can’t seem to hold you like I want to,_ **

Grant could feel her breath on his neck as he held her close, needing to feel the warmth that only she could provide his cold and lost soul. 

The logical side of him pushed away the reminders that she knew something was going on and he should stay away from her before revealing anything else before she could unencrypt the hard drive.  Hearts are not so easily ignored, however, and if she was allowing him this after all that’s happened…he’d gladly take it.

Small hands ran up and down his back, fingers tracing his spine causing him to shiver. 

 ** _So I can feel you in my arms_**.

He pressed his lips to the side of her hair and let himself breathe in the scent that was her, engraving it into his mind for after they were separated.  A deep sigh escaped her and he couldn’t help wondering if she felt the same as he did. Knowing they were screwed…just trying to enjoy it before life fucks it up again. 

Leaning back away from her, he brought his hands up to brush the hair away from her face, ignoring the tears in the corner of her eyes and her desperate attempt to swallow them back.  His rough hands cupped her face, pressing his mouth to her forehead before tilting her head up to look at him. 

The sadness in her eyes confirmed his hypothesis and the pain in his heart was so intense he had to shut his eyes to regain his control. 

Small hands now gripped his wrists and pulled her up to bring her lips up to ghost over his before he closed the distance and slanted his mouth over hers in a timid kiss that only lasted a few seconds before she placed her feet back flat on the floor. 

Her tear glossed eyes never leaving his.

**_Nobody’s gonna come and save you, we’ve pulled too many false alarms_ **

Honestly, they were both screwed. 

The thought hit him like a ton of bricks, when he realized what all they had been through up to this point.  Shitty childhood’s aside, they both came to the team under false pretenses, slept with people who didn’t mean anything to them, and lied to their team who they referred to as friends. 

Even if the team found them, and her feelings were real, they would probably think she ran off with him to join Hydra.  He had no doubt they would already brand his feelings for her a lie, May would make sure of that after the whole Lorelei incident.

The irony of the situation was that they both were just trying to find a place in the world where they felt wanted—his just ended up being an old Nazi organization by association with a man he owed his life to.

Skye actually found her home…he wasn't going to bring her down with him.

* * *

 

**_We’re going down, and you can see it too._ **

“Skye-“ She steeled herself for whatever was coming next. The way he stared at her a few seconds ago…she knew he figured it out.  Now that he knew his secret was out, maybe they could finally drop this act.

  _If_ it was one.

This boat was going down in flames anyway; why not try being honest for once. 

 “Skye, you need to know, before this goes any farther." She felt her chin wobble slightly before she bit her bottom lip to control it’s movement.“My feelings for you…I-I’ve never felt anything like them before…and I just need you to remember that. Okay?”

**_We’re going down, and you know that we’re doomed._ **

Skye nodded her head quickly before burying her face back into his chest.   She knew just as well as he did, that this was going to end badly. 

He brought his arms around her once more and she made no move to untangle herself.  Screw believing him or not, she was taking the comfort and warmth he was offering even if it was only temporary. Closing her eyes, she tightened her own hold on him when she felt his fingers tangle themselves in her hair and she took a deep breath to calm herself.  She couldn’t explain the overwhelming security she felt in his arms—usually she found explaining meant it wasn’t what she thought it was—she just knew that for the first time in her life she felt more safe than she ever had before. 

The fact that he was a criminal would have to wait.

**_My dear we’re slow dancing in a burning room._ **

* * *

 

A door behind him flew open and he didn’t’ have to turn around to know who it was.  He’d been on the plane all along and knew it was a matter of time before Garrett sent his lapdog down with a message. 

“Garrett says she’s stalling. He wants the hard drive in the next hour.”

His chin lifted up from her forehead as he looked over his shoulder, the hand he had been running through her hair now cupping the back of her head holding her to his chest.

“I’ll handle it.”

The clunky steps faded down the hall and he let out an annoyed sigh when Skye half-heartedly pushed herself away from him. All he’s ever wanted to do since he joined this team was protect her and with the way she’s looking at him now, he knows his job as protector is over.

**_I was the one you always dreamed of,_ **

“Skye-“

“What is _Deathlok_ doing on the plane?”

Deciding that silence was the best course of action he looked away and leaned back on the railing of the spiral staircase, willing to accept any punishment she threw his way. She knew why Mike Peterson was there, he wasn’t going to make things worse and act like she couldn’t have figured it out.  

As if they c _ould get_ any worse.

**_You were the one I tried to draw._ **

Her jaw was jutted forward in defiance as the usual spunk came back to life in her.  He didn’t know whether to be proud or scared. 

Skye shook her head and let out a weak laugh as she put her hands on her hips and walked away from him.  “What’s next Grant?” Her hands flew up in the air as her voice rose in anger, “Are you going to pull your gun out on me this time?”

His jaw flew open in protest but her accusations cut him off. “Why don’t you guys aim a little higher up this time,” Her words dripped with venom as they sunk deep into his mind, “Maybe you’d like to try for my heart....seems to be a favorite target of yours.”

He couldn't take it anymore.

**_How dare you say it’s nothing to me,_ **

“You think I had a part in _that_?” He pushed off of the railing and advanced on her slowly, “You know how I feel about you Skye.”

Grant grimaced slightly as he saw the anger flash in her eyes once more, lowering his own back down to the floor in shame, “So, even though you've been _lying_ ,” He winced at the way she said it, “To _everyone_ , about _everything_ ,” He prepared himself for the worst. “You’re saying you’re feelings for me—“

“They’re real Skye,” He was not leaving her with the notion he didn't care…He told her earlier, and he’d tell her a thousand more times if he had to. “They always have been, just like I said earlier.”

His hands reached forward to cup her face and to smooth away the hair hanging in her eyes. The gleam in them from before, long gone. 

**_Baby you’re the only light I ever saw._ **

If he had to look into her eyes for one more minute he’d go insane, but he held her gaze none the less, waiting for her to pass her judgment. She was his light at the end of the tunnel, but the tunnel collapsed to early.

“You weren't part of my mission, this wasn't supposed to—“

“I’m gonna throw up.”

The explanation died on his lips as she turned away from him and wrapped her arms around herself; he swore he felt his own stomach twist as a wave of nausea swept over him.

 ** _I’ll make the most of all the sadness_** ,

The railing under his fingers felt as if it would snap into if he gripped it any harder, but he bottled up the emotions bubbling up from the past.  He deserved her anger, her hate, and so much more.

Doesn’t mean he was happy about it.

A quick glance around and his eyes landed on the monitors on the side panel of the hangar.  His eyes widened in shock and he sighed in relief before regaining his composure.  He had to buy them more time.

If he pulled this off, he knew he’d be okay not seeing her for the rest of his life, as long as he knew she was okay.

His hands pushed him off the railing to stand up straight and he ran his fingers through his hair trying to quell the frustrated growl that he wanted to release.  He held his own head in his hands and began to pace back and forth as she hurled one insult after another his way, remaining ever silent. 

**_You’ll be a bitch because you can_ **

When he realized the words had stopped hitting him he turned to face her once more in time to watch her wipe tears from her eyes, trying to regain her composure to continue with the insults. “H-How…dare you.”

“Skye.”

An agonizing yell left her lips and she closed in on him and he instantly put his hands up as an instinct only to have her small hands connect with his chest with a powerful shove.  “You lying bastard-“, he only saw her fist before it connected with his jaw, “-son of a bitch—“. 

Grant grabbed both of her wrists in an attempt to end her assault; they were running out of time.

**_You’ll try to hit me just to hurt me, so you leave me feeling dirty, because you can’t understand_ **

He jerked her wrists towards his chest and locked them in a hold to prevent further outbursts.

“Skye…someday you’ll understand.”

Hair flew all directions as she furiously shook her head, “No, I won’t, and I’ll never _ever_ give you what you want.”

* * *

 

An explosion caused the plane to shudder violently and she felt his hands on her waist keeping her against his chest as he held onto the railing.  It all happened so fast she didn't think to push him off until she regained her footing.

**_We’re going down_ **

Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion as she watched him reach behind him and bring his gun out of the waistband of his pants, sending a jolt of fear throughout her whole being.  She knew very well he wouldn’t ever hurt her, but why else would he need his gun—

The said gun ended up shoved into her hands before she looked up at him, questions on her lips, “Skye, I need you to go and hide,” The pleading look in his eyes sent her brain into a clouded fall as she tried to figure out which Grant she was speaking to now.  Why did things keep changing so quickly?

“I only had 24 hours to deliver you to Garrett, Deathlok will be looking for you.”

Skye pulled away slightly to look over her shoulder in the direction of the explosion before she felt fingers pulling her chin back.

**_And you can see it too_ **

There was actually _fear_ in Grant Ward’s eyes as he tripped over his words. “I-I only took you with me to keep you safe and buy time until I could figure out another solution, but—“

Shouting could be heard above them from where they stood by the stairs.

“Skye, look at me.” His voice was urgent now, whatever this was…it was serious…”You need to run.  If it’s Hydra soldiers, I’ll try and hold them off and stall.”

**_We’re going down_ **

“If it’s S.H.I.E.L.D.,” her eyes widened in anticipation of what he might say. What would he do? He shook his head and began to back away from her to glance up the stairs, “I’ll give myself up.”

She blinked. Did he?

What?

_No, keep up the act Skye, don’t let him know how you really feel._

 “Grant.”

His eyes lowered slowly to meet hers and he let a weak smile shine through all of the turmoil around them, “I’m tired of losing things Skye—it’s just not worth it anymore.”

If it was Hydra, and she had his gun, he was sacrificing himself.  She may be pissed off but she didn't want him dying on her account…not after everything they’ve been through. 

**_And you know that we’re doomed._ **

Tears sprung to her eyes.

She didn't want him dying at all.

She loved him.

**_My dear, we’re slow dancing in a burning room_ **

The sound of his gun hitting the floor brought his attention back to her as she flung herself into his arms and grabbed the back of his head yanking it down to her level before crashing her lips on his own.  She felt him respond instantly and her sob broke them apart briefly before she peppered kisses frantically all over his face.

This might be the last time she ever saw him.

“Skye, please, go—“

“No!”

There was no controlling it now.  She was tired of losing too and it wasn’t fair that they were both losing only to gain nothing. 

Her fingers wove through his hair as their foreheads touched and his nose nuzzled her own, his fingers wiping her tears off of her cheeks in a futile effort to calm her down; the footsteps and shouting getting louder the closer they got.

**_Go cry about it- why don’t you?_ **

“Freeze!” Skye looked up quickly to the top of the stairs when she heard the familiar voice and watched with mixed emotions as they closed in on them, guns drawn. “Let her go Ward.”

Her eyes flitted back to Grant’s face, his head bowed slightly with his eyes closed; hands still holding her face.

**_Go cry about it-why don’t you?_ **

“ _Now_!”

May’s tone sounded lethal and she flinched herself in fear.

Slowly, she watched him raise his hands in surrender behind his head, all the while keeping his eyes on her. She had no idea what to do. This was what she wanted right? This is what was necessary?

**_Go cry about it-why don’t you?_ **

The grip on his shirt tightens and tears flow down her cheeks once more when he shakes his head. He didn’t want her to help him. He really was giving himself up. But why?

Her eyes searched his for an answer and he nodded his head slightly before whispering, “I love you.” It was so low she barely heard it meaning the others were clueless, but she found herself nodding in response, hoping he understood.

**_My dear we’re slow dancing in a burning room._ **

A sob escapes her as she clings to his shirt again leaning her forehead on his chest. Grant tilted his head back into his hands to look up at the ceiling and she felt him take in deep breaths, as if he was attempting to control his own emotions that were surfacing.

She couldn’t believe that all in an hour, she went from being happy, to hating him, to loving him, and trying desperately to keep him with her.  Life _seriously_ needed to take a walk.

**_Burning room_ **

Jemma’s arms around her brought her out of her thoughts as she watched in shock when Tripp kicked the backs of Grant’s knees causing him to crumble to the floor, roughly shoving him the rest of the way. Fitz’s arms took Jemma’s place as the scientist tried to turn Skye’s face to look away from the scene wiping the tears from her face only for more to fall.

**_Burning room_ **

His stare still hasn’t left hers when they cuff his hands behind his back and she wonders if he’s using her as a distraction from what’s happening, the thought alone ripping a scream from her.

“Stop! Please!”

“Skye stop! You’re safe now!”

Coulson was in his face once they haul him to his feet, informing him of all the ways they’re going to torture him for information and punishment for his crimes, before shoving him towards the hangar doors. The jolt of the plan landing made her realize May must have taken over the cockpit and she wondered briefly how Garrett felt for letting them arrest Ward, telling his lapdog Peterson to escape.  

Probably doesn’t care.

**_Burning room_ **

Grant turned his body to look back at her and she resumed the fight to get away from FitzSimmons; her strength failing her from fatigue as they kept her in place.

“Please! You don’t understand! Garrett—”

The back of a hand turned her head violently to the side and she kept her eyes on the ground as she regained her breath, hearing Grant’s screams of protest in the background.

“That’s enough Skye.”

Skye blew a puff of air in an attempt to get her hair out of her face as she brought her head up to look into the cold eyes of the Cavalry, glaring into them with a hatred she’d never known.  The older woman seemed taken back slightly at the intensity of her gaze before walking over to the panel on the wall to lower the hangar doors.

Frantically Skye looked for something to help her escape the grip her two friends have on her but found nothing.  He was still turned towards her when she finally brought her eyes back to his shaking her head in defeat as they pull him out of the hangar and shove him into the backseat of a black SUV.

**_Burning room_ **

The minute he’s thrown into the backseat is when all of the energy leaves Skye at once and she falls to her knees causing the grip her friends have on her arm to waver before releasing completely. She catches herself on her hands and swivels to the side to sit on the cold hangar floor, hair covering her face in a curtain.

“Skye.”

A timid hand from the scientist causes Skye to jerk away. She doesn’t want their help right now.  A time will come when she will be okay, and she will be their friends, but today is not the day.

Tomorrow wasn’t looking so hot either.

 

* * *

 

He tuned out the lectures of the two U.S. army generals in front of him, instead hitting the back of his head against the head rest a couple times before closing his eyes. 

The SUV drowned out her cries, but it didn’t help the aching in his heart from being away from her already.  He knows she may not understand now—maybe she already did and that’s why she was crying—but he understood the nod of her head after his confession to her. 

He could live with the knowledge that she at least loved him back. The question he was left to wrestle with now was could he live with what all he had done? Not only to those he’s murdered at Garrett’s will, but to her?

A tear slipped out of the corner of his eye and he let his head lean to look out the window as he watched the Bus shrink into the distance as they drove away.

**_Don’t you think we oughta know by now?_ **

In hindsight, he really shouldn’t be all that surprised at how things played out.  
 _  
 **Don’t you think we should’ve learned somehow?**_

They’ve both made too many mistakes to deserve a happy ending.

**Author's Note:**

> And that ladies and gentlemen is my mood. Lol But no seriously. Comment and tell me what you think like seriously please. I’m still slowly updating the story with my original character that no one seems to see and I’m still working on the final chapter of Break My Heart But it Won’t Bleed…I’m trying to overcome the awkwardness that was that last chapter.
> 
> But uh…all I gotta say is….holy shit ComicCon….OFF THE CHAIN. I’m going next year. Done deal. Already signed up for ticket reminders. Yeah, it’s on that level. 
> 
> Until then my lovelies.


End file.
